so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
