google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
