im gay
i know
yea but for you.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize