i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
