Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
