i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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