your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
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