My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Dick very happy bro
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