Texts From Last Night

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  (631): View more from New York

  Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it

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  (631): Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it http://tfl.nu/0u81
  Replies (1) Good night (1213) Bad night (620)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant

  (360): View more from Washington

  At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats

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  (206): She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant (360): At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats http://tfl.nu/21vb
  Replies (5) Good night (770) Bad night (2326)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am

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  (610): i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am http://tfl.nu/0mrv
  Replies (6) Good night (4986) Bad night (931)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"

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  (608): so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!" http://tfl.nu/79w8
  Replies (37) Good night (10001) Bad night (2338)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.

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  (217): It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol. http://tfl.nu/d6go
  Replies (3) Good night (3314) Bad night (1138)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks

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  (603): I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks http://tfl.nu/p1yw
  Replies (12) Good night (3597) Bad night (2113)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.

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  (207): My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad. http://tfl.nu/6faf
  Replies (8) Good night (4660) Bad night (1245)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.

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  (801): Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard. http://tfl.nu/rl99
  Replies (9) Good night (2503) Bad night (905)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.

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  (317): Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor. http://tfl.nu/nqp0
  Replies (6) Good night (1724) Bad night (556)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.

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  (563): Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit. http://tfl.nu/it5v
  Replies (8) Good night (1568) Bad night (797)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.

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  (360): I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow. http://tfl.nu/5cxp
  Replies (4) Good night (490) Bad night (803)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.

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  (312): Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'. http://tfl.nu/60ox
  Replies (10) Good night (1306) Bad night (466)
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  (229): View more from Georgia

  Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.

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  (229): Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat. http://tfl.nu/64z4
  Replies (15) Good night (526) Bad night (1169)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.

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  (253): I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise. http://tfl.nu/nmya
  Replies (1) Good night (452) Bad night (345)
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  (707): View more from California

  I woke up with your vibrator in my face

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  (707): I woke up with your vibrator in my face http://tfl.nu/fehl
  Replies (2) Good night (319) Bad night (459)

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