Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.