Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
