With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I can't trust your balls anymore.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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