went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
