She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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