I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
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