Say something about gay babies.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
She's the barista slut.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
