nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
