Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
