I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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