the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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