Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
