is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
