yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize