that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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