SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
