these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
