Heybabeimwearingurpanties
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize