Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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