so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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