found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
