im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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