Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
barbara walters just said penis...
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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