I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
