i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
