Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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