Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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