everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
