Texts From Last Night

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  (805): View more from California

  I just tipped a bartender in xanax.

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  (805): I just tipped a bartender in xanax. http://tfl.nu/pn9d
  Replies (16) Good night (3148) Bad night (453) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.

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  (913): My favorite part of our friendship is your tits. http://tfl.nu/3eyr
  Replies (19) Good night (4258) Bad night (617) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.

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  (919): i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off (617): he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich. http://tfl.nu/ubgv
  Replies (28) Good night (2614) Bad night (673)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.

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  (516): I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen. http://tfl.nu/vaik
  Replies (13) Good night (1085) Bad night (3486) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  oh how i love working at summer camp.

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  (401): let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week. (401): oh how i love working at summer camp. http://tfl.nu/jjrc
  Replies (36) Good night (3117) Bad night (390)
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  (925): View more from California

  never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.

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  (925): never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont. http://tfl.nu/mow4
  Replies (52) Good night (516) Bad night (4011) Order T-Shirt
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  so today I found out that she used to be a he....

  (1-931): View more from Tennessee

  are you gonna get a divorce?

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  (931): so today I found out that she used to be a he.... (1-931): are you gonna get a divorce? http://tfl.nu/5e03
  Replies (86) Good night (886) Bad night (16883) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.

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  (215): Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town. http://tfl.nu/ozti
  Replies (29) Good night (7534) Bad night (680) Order T-Shirt
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  (407): View more from Florida

  woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.

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  (407): woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over. http://tfl.nu/kn1h
  Replies (11) Good night (572) Bad night (3176) Order T-Shirt
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day

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  (502): Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day http://tfl.nu/ab75
  Replies (13) Good night (899) Bad night (4700) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me

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  (+44): Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me http://tfl.nu/dbfn
  Replies (9) Good night (958) Bad night (4077) Order T-Shirt
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  (509): View more from Washington

  I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.

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  (509): I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning. http://tfl.nu/olim
  Replies (7) Good night (2241) Bad night (451) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  How much did you drink?

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea

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  (630): How much did you drink? (708): Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea http://tfl.nu/hfkt
  Replies (2) Good night (1073) Bad night (558)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has

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  (860): Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has http://tfl.nu/jd7y
  Replies (2) Good night (660) Bad night (327) Order T-Shirt
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  (801): View more from Utah

  He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"

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  (801): He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick" http://tfl.nu/sbhu
  Replies (6) Good night (311) Bad night (785) Order T-Shirt

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