I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize