let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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