Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
