He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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