I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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