I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...