Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
It's shark week go big or go home
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
PANTIES FOUND
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