There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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