is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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