you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
whose parrot is this?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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