i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
