Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
