She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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