Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
