Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
the day after is always just damage control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
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