Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Randomize
